Are you HOT?Hot:

STATEMENT FOOTWEAR

Not:

FLATWEAR

FORGET hemline theory. There's a school of armchair economists who believe when times get tough, heels get higher: Think the platform shoes of the oil crisis '70s and the stilettos of the '90s dot-com bubble bust. Now, as the world teeters on the brink of economic calamity, we're teetering on wedges, platforms and pencil heels. Christian Louboutin's 160-millimetre pony-skin "Puck" ankle bootie (pictured left) says it all -- 6.3 inches of nosebleed-inducing, skyscraper-high podiatric absurdity. Where will it end? Only an economist can say for sure.

Hot:

OPTIMISTIC ORANGE

Not:

SUBTLETY

THE colour of 2012 will be "tangerine tango," a rich almost-red that radiates optimism, says the U.S.-based Pantone Color Institute, which predicts colour trends. Tangerine is not only more sophisticated than most shades of screaming orange, but far more forgiving as well. Pair it with white, cream or pale beige. Other top colours for 2012 include "bellflower," a soft purple; "solar power," a sunny yellow reminiscent of the '70s; hot "cabaret" pink, and "sodalite," a deep marine blue.

Hot:

COLOURED DENIM

Not:

MOM JEANS

COLOUR, not shape, is what makes denim hot this year. This winter, look for cobalt blue, emerald green, red and, of course, tangerine. Spring will bring denim in turquoise, yellow, violet and pink. What doesn't matter is the silhouette. Skinny or flared, high-waisted or navel-baring, take your pick, as long as it's in colour.

Hot:

BAUBLES

Not:

UNDERSTATED BLING

NOT since a much-younger Madonna swanned around in multiple chains and ropes of faux pearls in the 1980s have we seen this much hardware. Bib necklaces, necklaces worn as headbands and cocktail rings the size of a grade A jumbo egg. Prada, Lanvin and Marni have jumped in with frankly fake baubles. Earlier this month, Karl Lagerfeld dressed his models in gold and off-white and loaded them with bling for an Indian banquet-themed show for Chanel. "People have always responded to difficulty by dressing up in jewels," quipped Lagerfeld. In other words: Let them eat cake.

Hot:

TEXTURES THAT TAKE THEIR CUES FROM

THE ANIMAL KINGDOM

Not:

SIMPLE

TEXTURE

THIS year, Lady Gaga's more memorable fashion statements included a white feathered gown worthy of Swan Lake in Vogue and a feathered hat sprouting antlers. Fur is hot and so is faux fur, both realistic and blatantly fake, along with oversized iridescent paillettes that look like fish scales and fringe with a feathery texture. For winter 2012, wear a fur vest with an oversized rhinestone brooch or cinched with a belt.

Hot:

STATEMENT-MAKING FACIAL HAIR

Not:

THE CLEAN SHAVE

WHEN Liberal MP Justin Trudeau called Environment Minister Peter Kent a "piece of s " this month, the real question wasn't about declining parliamentary decorum. It was 'What the heck is Trudeau growing on his face?' Was he expressing solidarity with Occupy protesters who had adopted as their symbol a mask of Guy Fawkes, one of the conspirators behind the failed 1605 Gunpowder Plot to blow up Parliament (and the king)? Is he a fan of the 2005 film V for Vendetta, the tale of an anarchist revolutionary in a dystopian future whose trademark happens to be a Guy Fawkes mask? Or maybe Trudeau had simply forgotten Movember was over. Whatever. Facial hair that makes a statement will be hot this year. Even if you don't know what it's saying.

Hot:

GETTING PRIMED

FOR TARGET

Not:

THE LONG WAIT

TARGET fans in the U.S. eagerly await the department store giant's capsule collections from fashion designers like Isaac Mizrahi, Zac Posen, Anna Sui and the late Alexander McQueen. In September, Tarzhay launched a collection of more than 400 items -- from bathing suits to crib sheets -- featuring iconic prints by Missoni. Many were sold out quicker than you can say "luxury Italian knitwear." So when is it Canada's turn? The chain plans to open 105 stores in former Zellers locations in Canada, but it will take six to nine months to remodel each store. The best guess is the first Target will open in March 2013.

Hope springs eternal.